California’s Bust: A Rap Song

(With apologies to Dre and Tupac)

California…knows how to party
California….don’t got no money
In the citaaaaay of LA
In the citaaaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaaaay, the city of Compton
They keep defaultin’, they keep defaultin’!

Now let me welcome everybody to the wild, wild west
Our bonds are untouchable like Elliot Ness
If you ain’t been foreclosed than you had some success
Pack some books fo’ yo’ cell if you gotta confess
We in that sunshine state with a bomb-site new street
The state where you always find a new build empty
And PIMPCO on a mission for them greens
Lean mean money-makin’-machine cheatin’ fiends
I been in the game sixteen years watchin’ crises
Banks gone down just like Vanilla Ice, geez
Now it’s ‘09 and my creditors watch me
My credit rating’s dead just like Liberace
It’s no good, from Diego to the Bay
Your city is the bomb if your city makin’ pay
Throw up a finger if you feel the same way
For the crooks that bankrupted
Californ-i-a

California…knows how to party
California…. don’t got no money
In the citaaaaay of LA
In the citaaaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaaaay, the city of Compton
They keep defaultin’, they keep defaultin’!

Make it make a payment
Make it make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali
Make it make a payment
Make a make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali

Out on bail, fresh out of jail California dreamin’
Soon as I stepped on the scene, I’m hearin’ lenders screamin’
They want my money and alcohol
My life as a west side playa flippin’ houses don’t work at all
Only in Cali where we riot not rally to live and die
In LA we payin’ Fargo not BAC (that’s right)
Dressed in Locs and khaki suits and ride is what we do
To find a mortgage with a rate less than nine point two
Famous because we don’t pay worldwide
Let ‘em recognize from Long Beach to Norway
The statement came and we said no way, it’s west side
So you know the row won’t pay out to no man
Say what you say
Just look at this bomb site today
Let me sell you half the streets in LA
From Oakland to Sac-town
The Bay Area and back down
Cali’s where house prices got a smack-down
Now we bust!

California…knows how to party
California…. don’t got no money
In the citaaaaay of LA
In the citaaaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaaaay, the city of Compton
They keep defaultin’, they keep defaultin’!

Now make a payment…

Make it make a payment
Make it make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali
Make it make a payment
Make a make a payment
Make it make it Arnie
Make it Cali

Uh, Long Beach out tha house, uh yeah
Oaktown, Oaktown definitely lost they house, hahaha
Frisco, Frisco
Hey, you know LA down in this
Pasadena, price gone splat
Inglewood, Inglewood always up to no good
Even Hollywood tryin’ to lose a piece baby
Sacramento, Sacramento, where you at? Yeah

Throw it up y’all, throw it up, throw it up
Let’s show these fools how we do it on that west side
Remember when it was the best side

Yeah, that’s right
West coast, west coast
Uh, California’s bust….
California’s bust…..

If only Macro Man knew how to overdub lyrics on music videos…..

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